Monday, October 24, 2005

Those little whippersnappers...sometimes they can teach the old folks a thing or two

It occurred to me this morning, as Mr. Blogger downed yet another energy drink while shaving, that I am very much enjoying not having to get up in the morning for work. Granted, I'm not too thrilled with the reason I'm off the merry-go-round right now, but the getting-to-sleep-whenever-I-feel-like-it part is a nice bonus.

I do, however, miss the boost to my self-esteem and general bastion of good gossip that the workplace provides. My job was always the one thing that gave me a sense of accomplishment that nothing else could mimic. I knew that I could pretty much climb any ladder, and attack any task, and it made me feel better about myself (as you well know by now, finding something to do that is quite the quest for the Holy Grail around here).

What I really miss though, are the people. And I especially miss being a (or really their) manager. In the last 17 years of managing in this industry, I've made more friends than I can count. And most of them were once a member of my staff.

In case you hadn't noticed, most of the comments on this blog are from my most recent gang of misfits (it's a term of endearment!). Emily, G/\\R*E, kiwi, et al, are actually the crazy kids who talked me into writing to begin with. After I had left that job due to the overwhelmingly mountainous levels of stress that even I had to just throw up my hands and say "GIVE!" to, I tried another on for size before the body and spirit ultimately collapsed.

Since we were all still in touch, it pained me to let them know I was going to have to be on disability...AGAIN. I was ashamed and embarrassed, so I took the coward's way out and sent a text.

I got an e-mail back from Emily:


we were talking that maybe you should consider just writing. i can totally see you with a blog, but X thinks you would be awesome maybe going along the lines of a column or even a book. just freelancing. fuck banking. what good were those college years if you didn't drink and you aren't using your degree anyway? alright, my idea is being vetoed. Y agrees with X, they've got your next 10 years planned out doing editorials but they're arguing over what you'd write about. Y is voting for you writing about music. X is leaning more towards "she has the sophistication to not only be a guest columnist but even a ghostwriter for a book... she could write about anything she wanted to in any style she wanted to."

anywho, just an idea. something that's still considered working but no boss, no timeframe, no limitations, NO CUSTOMERS. you'd get the validation of " XX Visitors to this Site" and/or "My work was featured in ________" yet without having to set any true expectations or standards.

(Anyone who has not given me permission to use a real name has been X'd and Y'd...the last thing I need is to get them in trouble at The Company With No Soul.)

As is obvious by now, I started with the blog idea, and may yet work my way up to more. Their belief in me is appreciated, but still slightly unwarranted...I haven't determined if I'm really just as talented as they seem to think.

And lest I forget my own mentors, I must mention I've also been lucky enough to have some AMAZINGLY TALENTED bosses over the years ( rule!) . They showed me through their leadership that it was possible to be an excellent manager, and yet still maintain a kind and caring demeanor with your staff. The old "lead through instilling fear" mantra was a load of crap. I heeded their advice.

So thanks to my staff, and their encouragement, and the relationship we were able to build, I'm finding that the writing gives me a reason to STOP sleeping and actually get up in the morning. I had no idea it would become that important.

I'll take that boost over an energy drink any day.


Blogger emily said...

Oh "X" and "Y" are SO getting a great big "i told you so"! And I (tear) feel so (sniffle) special (sob) to be quoted (sniffle sniffle) in your blog (big donald duck nose blow). although if i'd known it was going to come back to haunt me i probably would have copied and pasted into Word first to double check my grammar. and spelling.

but why doubt our sincerity in your abilities? would we dare have suggested it, knowing we would be expected to (gasp!) read it AND comment everyday? Do you really think this bunch of mostly anti-feelers would subject ourselves to that just to make you feel better? i think not!

get over it. you're talented. you even have that fancy schmancy degree to prove it.

3:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're a third generation writer and I hope one of us finally gets something significant published. Tag - you're it.

4:13 PM  
Blogger emily said...

ha! there, ya see? your mother proved my point AND she knows you better than i do.

6:42 PM  
Blogger kiwi said...

"The Company With No Soul" how true it is. I feel so loved and apart of the "gang." At least the pre-Company With No Soul gang. I still think you would be great doing music reviews. You're such a music freak. Why not get paid for it?

8:04 PM  
Anonymous M-I-L said...

"The Company With No Soul" Ha! Watch out you don't get 'Dooced'! (See? I'm even learning da lingo! ;-D )

To paraphrase another slogun I learned recently, "B.R.DOUBLE-O.K.E. Write! Write! Write!"

Yeah, well, it almost scanned! lol :-p

12:40 AM  
Blogger G/\R*E said...

Brooke, your talent and enthusiasm are real and you are certainly not lazy. A career in writing seems right down your alley. Although I don't believe you should kick your self and feel that there’s a lack of self-esteem and feeling of no accomplishment because your health stinks right now. You bring the same five or six people every day to see what you have written about today, and we get excited to respond and interact with your blog. That to me is an accomplishment and I hope it is to you also. If I got as much response to my blog (if I actually blogged) as you do, I would think it was pretty damn cool. I'm not saying you don't appreciate your blog or anything, I just hope you don't think you don't have a purpose anymore because you’re not working right now. You're just as special as any other day working or not and are expressing your feeling through your computer every day. Sounds good to me.

4:04 AM  
Anonymous KG said...

darling, of COURSE you are a WRITER! you have been a fabulous one since the day i met you! and that would be about 28 years ago;)... it's only now that you have had a little bit of free time to recognize your true calling in life.... WRITE, WRITE, WRITE...

we love it (and you)....

10:11 AM  

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